"Cons" and "Pros"

After living through a particularly tough week, I've been taking these last few days to rest and recharge. I really blew it last week-- lost my temper, then kicked myself around for a day or two for doing it. I apologized to the other person, but I kept kicking myself anyway.

Not Always a Grinch . . .

I don't know about you, but most days, I'm my own worst critic. Where does that come from? I'm not sure, but I've always had this perfectionistic streak, even from the age of seven when I thought I could just pick up a bowling ball and roll a 200 game my first time out. I cried then, and I cried this week as I failed to live up to my own expectations.

Do you do that? Do you set your own standards so high that you're sure to disappoint yourself? And after that, do you stand around and kick yourself for failing? Why? 

So this week's "Inspiring Words" post has to do with using words to inspire ourselves. When I was younger, I used to take a piece of paper and draw a line down the center, entitling one side "Pro" and the other side "Con." Then I'd list all the benefits and drawbacks of whatever I needed to make a decision about. Well, I think sometimes we do this when we think about our own behavior. Granted, sometimes our "con" list is warranted, like when we lash out at others. But for a lot of people, especially women (I suspect), we make our "con" list a lot longer than it should be. 

Do we take our "con" list and keep adding to it? Do we think of ourselves as short-fused, but then add the words "mean," "selfish," "uncaring," and "impatient?" Does our "con" list far outweigh our "pro" list? Or, do we even make a "pro" list?

If you've been beating yourself up lately, then I ask you to do an exercise with me. Get a piece of paper and a pen or pencil. No, you may not use a computer, ipad or phone. There's something about directing your thoughts to a handheld pen or pencil that helps your brain focus better. Anyway, do you have your paper and pen? Good.

Now, just write a list of all the "pros" about you. Go ahead, let yourself think highly of yourself, just for a few minutes. It's okay; you won't be showing this to anyone (unless you want to). What is good about you? Here, let me help:

• Do you stand up for people?
• Do you take food to someone who's ill or grieving?
• Do you send cards to encourage others or to congratulate them?
• Do you give to charities, either with your time or your money?
• Do you love children or animals?
• Do you work with the elderly?
• Do you have a great sense of humor?
• Do you seek out the person sitting alone in the cafeteria and ask them to join you?
• Do you invite people to church?
• If someone needs a cough drop or a drink of water, do you jump up and get it for them?
• Do you try to comfort someone who's hurting?
• Do you pray for others?

I'm guessing you can identify with at least one or two of these things on the list above. Probably more. Add them to your "pro" list. If these suggestions help you find more things, then add those, too. The point is, we can acknowledge our "cons" and try to work on them, but we need to balance them with the "pros" about ourselves that we know to be true. ** If you really cannot think of anything at all that's good about yourself, then please have a heart-to-heart with a trusted friend or family member who can help you see what they see in you. **

No one is all good or all bad. But if we focus only on our "cons," then we can get mired down in negativity and lose our self-esteem. Remember, Jesus Christ came down from heaven to become a sacrifice for ALL people, to save them from their sins and guarantee eternal life for all who believe in Him. Why would He have done that if we weren't so very precious to Him?

So, go ahead and recognize your mistakes and try to make better choices next time. But don't stay in that frame of mind. Remember that "God doesn't make junk," and that He loves you. If God loves you, then who are you to disagree?